“I bet you have had pretty girl privilege your whole life.”
“You're just fishing for attention.”
“But you don’t look like a fat girl in your images.”
These comments echo so frequently in my life that they've become background noise, a constant "womp womp womp."
This highlights a significant issue with social media: it rarely shows the whole picture. While I do share professional images of myself, which make me feel amazing and confident, they can create a misleading illusion. These images don’t reflect the entirety of my experiences or who I am as a person. The gap between these polished pictures and my reality often leads to harsh judgments and the undermining of my real-life struggles.
For those who don’t know me beyond my social media posts, let me share a bit more about my journey:
I wasn’t the "pretty girl" or even the "cute girl" growing up. I had less than a handful of friends, and in hindsight, I can’t truly call them friends. I was never part of any social clique. In fact, I was often bullied and beaten by both boys and girls because they thought I was ugly. The torment was so severe that I changed schools every six months until, by 10th grade, I couldn’t bear the isolation and daily lunchroom torment anymore. I withdrew and began homeschooling.
This part of my life was incredibly painful and shaped who I am today.
When you follow someone on social media, remember that you’re only seeing a curated glimpse into their lives. You don't truly know them or their struggles.
Some might think I’m just seeking attention. But those who truly know me understand that my goal is far deeper. I am striving to show you that confidence is attainable for everyone. It's right within your grasp if you’re willing to take the steps to achieve it.
The reason I don’t appear to be "a fat girl" in some of my images is because I am hyperfocused on being the best photographer I can be. I understand bodies, body language, emotive states, angles, lighting, posing, and how to dress for my curves. This knowledge and skill set allow me to present myself in ways that highlight my strengths and make me feel powerful.
I also want to point out the fatal flaw in putting people on a pedestal. You can stand for something and still have weaknesses or falter. Not a single soul is perfect. You can be a 'spokesperson' for something and still have struggles to overcome. It’s a part of being human. Even those who appear confident and composed have their own battles. My professional images are just one facet of who I am. They don’t negate the struggles and insecurities I face.
I share my professional photos because they represent a piece of my journey to confidence. But I also share my everyday, unfiltered selfies to remind you and myself of where I come from.
Please, let’s stop judging and start understanding. Every person you encounter, online or in real life, has a story that’s shaped them. Let’s approach each other with kindness and empathy and focus on uplifting rather than tearing down.
I urge you to look beyond the surface and recognize that everyone has their own story. My mission is to help others find their confidence, to guide them towards a place of self-acceptance and strength.
Together, we can create a space where we celebrate each other’s journeys and support each other in our growth.
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